Hilarious Signs from England


1. IN A LAUNDROMAT:
    Automatic washing machines. Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.
2. IN A LONDON DEPARTMENT STORE:
    Bargain Basement Upstairs
3. IN AN OFFICE:
    Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further
    steps will be taken.
4. IN ANOTHER OFFICE:
    After the tea break staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining
    board.
5. ON A CHURCH DOOR:
    This is the gate of Heaven. Enter ye all by this door. (This door is kept locked because
    of the draft. Please use side entrance)
6. OUTSIDE A SECOND HAND SHOP:
    We exchange anything - bicycles, washing machines etc. Why not bring your wife along
    and get a wonderful bargain.
7. QUICKSAND WARNING:
    Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District
    Council.
8. NOTICE IN A DRY CLEANER'S WINDOW:
    Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of.
9. IN A HEALTH FOOD SHOP WINDOW:
    Closed due to illness.
10. SPOTTED IN A SAFARI PARK:
      Elephants Please Stay In Your Car
11. SEEN DURING A CONFERENCE:
      For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a day care on the first floor.
12. NOTICE IN A FIELD:
      The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.
13. MESSAGE ON A LEAFLET:
      If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.
14. ON A REPAIR SHOP DOOR:
      We can repair anything (Please knock hard on the door - the bell doesn't work)
15. SPOTTED IN A TOILET IN A LONDON OFFICE BLOCK:
      Toilet out of order. Please use floor below